…..Because its almost Friday. Because lists are fun.
10. I can’t, for the life of me, remember what my husband and I used to do all day on Saturdays prior to having kids.
9. I have resorted to referring to myself in the 3rd person. Ex:“Mommy is so tired.”
8. I no longer call the bathroom, “the bathroom.” It is strictly, “The Potty.”
7. For some reason I find it absolutely necessary to combine numbers 9 and 8 together: “Mommy has to go potty.” … you know you do it too.
6. When driving in the car I point and scream “Digger!” with more enthusiasm than I used to said “Yes!” on the day my husband proposed….. even when driving alone.
5. I have not been to a movie in the theater since Juno. That movie came out the year my first son was born………
4. For a total of 25 (unconsecutive) months and counting I have (inconspicuously) whipped out my boobs at least 5 times per day… No matter when. No matter where. No matter what object I can find to conceal myself.
3. My constant backdrop of noise consists of “Vrooooom! Kachow! Pa-Chang! Vrr… Vrrr. VROOOOOMMMM!! ahhh!!!!! CRASH! Ugh! Oh Nooooo!!!! Your dead. ” Just the boy noises coming from my son as he plays with his airplanes. nbd.
3 continued…..That being said, I have a new appreciation for the sounds of silence, but that only lasts about 14 seconds before I remember that it probably means someone is up to no good.
2. When (if) I take a shower, I always, without fail, hear phantom baby cries. I end up turning the water on and off several times (suds still in hair) to listen for the baby crying… Typically they are just my imagination, but I swear I hear them and know I will probably never escape them. Or sleep through the night.
1. I have never felt so exhausted, un-listened to, helpless, relied upon and in need of wine and/or lattes while simultanesouly feeling alive, enamored, inspired, in love and loved.
Wow…Motherhood….this is some serious stuff.